Who is your soulmate?
The One who ‘completes’ you. The person is as important as the air you breathe, whose every move you know by heart. That beautiful soul’s presence makes you feel alive every day. The One, who is your reality and your fantasy at the same moment.
It comes as no surprise that the notion of a soulmate is mostly more romantic than the popular ideas of The One. To define a soulmate is improbable, for the concept of The Soulmate is sublime. Yes, plenty of people often make haste to claim that they have found soulmates, who sadly aren’t worth that estimation, and sooner rather than later disappoint their validation. But rationally, it is harder to ‘find’ a soulmate. It’s a matter of pure chance. You just meet the right person, your worlds collide and you automatically fall into a sync of sorts, like the idea of conjoined twins, once separated by the wrath of the Gods, now reunited by the kindness of Destiny and Love.
Once you meet your soulmate, you know that he/she is your soulmate. Before anything else. And the feeling is always shared, always mutual. A shared temperance of beautiful bondage that will last beyond a lifetime. The unbreakability of this bonding is its key beauty.
But, does the Soulmate have to be a romantic interest? There can be a lot of contesting opinions about the claim that The (Romantic) One is automatically the Soulmate too, naturally. Personally, I beg to differ, for I think that one’s soulmate can be anyone, any age, any race, any gender, anyone. He/she can be family, beau, or simply the friend. I also feel that the chances of finding more than one soulmate in a lifetime aren’t nil.
Thus, there must be some things you must compulsorily know about them, right? Most definitely. Knowing your soulmate well will bless you with a sense of bliss and security, it is an essential part of knowing you own self, and he/she is the Lego piece that completes your Lego house. Hopefully, this list, though not definitive, will serve as a refresher to the ones who know their soulmates. And to the ones who don’t yet, it might guide you to identify the Soulmate you know but don’t recognize yet, or the One who will soon come your way.
10. Is he/she your 4 o’clock person?
Your Soulmate is your 4 o’clock person. If he/she isn’t, I don’t actually need to state the obvious here but I will- they are not your soulmates. Not every 4 o’clock person you have is your soulmate but your soulmate will be there as and when you need them to. No questions asked. If any questions asked, then maybe only the few essential ones. They will support you, shield you, and heal you. They will be there at hospitals for you at odd hours, escort you to fishy places when necessary, sit and listen to every sob story of yours without any judgment, put your needs ahead of anyone else’s in every hour of your crisis.
9. What would they do if they won the lottery?
It’s not about the money alone. It’s about what they would do in real time to share such immense joys. Charity? A world tour? Lots of shopping? Awareness of how your soulmate behaves usually, and typically would in extreme situations, helps oneself to intrinsically attune yourselves to their movements in your world and theirs.
8. What makes their heart sing?
More often than not, it might have been the long list of interests. common and uncommon, that brought both of you closer initially. You definitely do know what your soulmate likes or dislikes: which movie they would go for, which cafes they haunt, what book are they reading right now, why do twinkling stars on moonless nights make them smile. And how you fit into that life perfectly, and they into yours. Never take such small things for granted. Knowledge of their passions reflects their true natures and tell you about the choices they would keep making over a lifetime.
Also be aware, you don’t need to have a host of common interests to qualify as soulmates. Just that, information of these sorts serves as the level ground for emotions to synthesis on. Don’t you think so?
7. Are they comfortable with silence?
Like Rowan Atkinson sings it, “You say it best, when you say nothing at all.” Around your soulmate, you will slip comfortably into silence and not feel threatened by it. The connection between the two of you is as good as telepathic. It is not very difficult to estimate every time what he/she must be thinking, or wanting to express, in regard to specific contexts, without them telling you how they feel like. You don’t feel the need to talk all the time, and can enjoy your private and shared space without any need for conscious coordination.
6. What makes them smile?
We live for happiness. Everything we do, we do them to attain some kind of joy. Sadness is elementarily the absence of happiness and our unrest stems from our desire to be happier. Your relationship with your soulmate is a happy one, because you are attuned to each other’s needs and you choose to fulfil them for a happy life. Knowing what makes them laugh, what brings tears to their eyes, what angers them, what makes them anxious is elementary to your relationship. A lack of knowledge of what influences your soulmate’s moods is slightly weird if you actually think that he/she is the One.
5. Would they go with you to a football match or watch a silly movie just to spend time with you?
A soulmate would do things for you your friend wouldn’t. They will naturally like to be around you and spend a lot of time with you. They will look into your eyes when they talk to you, make you laugh and actually pay attention to what you are saying. They will not mind doing silly things with you, what they usually wouldn’t alone or with anyone else, because they enjoy your company. But expecting your soulmate to be around you all the time and attend to you every time is outrageous. You will only be disappointing yourself with unrealistic expectations.
4. Who is on their speed dial list?
We are social creatures and we live in conjunction to a lot more people in our lives. You and your soulmates don’t live in a bubble and it is good to be attuned to the other people your soulmates share their lives with. But, you don’t have to be on best friend terms with every person who matters. Kindly don’t hack into their phones to check if your names are on their speed dials. If you are truly soulmates, such insecurities will naturally not creep up.
3. What are their deepest fears?
People do not share their deepest fears too quickly. They only confide in their closest confidante. And ideally, the worst of the fears can only be shared with the soulmates. Because that vulnerability is neither easy to express, nor easy to handle. Confidence to share one’s deepest secret naturally require immense amount of trust and only a true soulmate can be trusted as much. So if he/she has confided in you, your duty to comfort and to maintain discretion is paramount. Confiding in your soulmate will never invite the apprehension of deceit and betrayal.
2. Do you make a good team?
“It’s me and you against the world.” If there is one person with whom you can share these few words with, you have a soulmate. It is natural to feel inseparable from your soulmate. To be attached at the hip, finish each other sentences, look at each other across the room and smile instinctively at inside jokes. It is necessary that your soulmate is capable of adapting and adjusting to the changes in your life, just as you should be to his, for the relationship to be an organic one. Both of you must be willing to be there at every step of your way and overcome even the severest of the hardships together. Looking at every dawn after a dark night with the satisfaction of the feeling that you have each other at the end of every ordeal, come what may.
1. Is he/she is willing to sustain communication with you no matter what?
Communication is what every relationship is built upon. It is what sustains it. It is helps you grow, develop, mature. Disagreements between two discerning individuals are only natural, so don’t let fights create and nurture doubts about your relationship with your soulmate. It is a social contract as much as it is a spiritual one, so it is healthy to communicate and re-examine whatever needs to be evaluated from time to time. If there is something upsetting that needs to be said and clarified, go ahead and do it. It is through communication that you will know how your soulmate feels and thinks about various events and issues around you.
Having a soulmate is beautiful blessing, for it helps to grapple with the existential emptiness we face. It is not the center of our lives, but rather a support. We should never take it for granted neither glorify it more than it needs to be. It is not the fire that consumes you but the blush of warmth of a breeze in a cozy summer afternoon. Know them, cherish them, and rejoice in their company. It is the love that will last you.
So, Have you met your Soulmate? Can you you think of more things we must know? Do share!