Death is unavoidable and unpredictable. You would never know when someone will die. Though average human life is 75-80 now not everyone dies naturally. Some people die because of accidents. No matter how death happens, but it shatters and leaves the dearest ones under shock. It is one of the most profound losses one can experience. Parents are the least selfish and most lovable people in all human beings life. So, the death of a parent can be very dreadful for anyone.
If your friend or loved one has lost his parent, it is difficult to take them out of that frame. It is tough to recover from the loss because kids have a lot of attachment with parents and its not easily forgotten. Therefore, we are providing ten ways to help someone coping with a parent’s death.
10. Understand The Grieving Process
Dealing with the death of a parent can be very hard. So, while supporting someone to cope up with it, you must understand the grieving process properly. Everyone grieves at a different rate. Try not to take that person directly out of that phase. Give time to that person to get over the loss. The first few days will be difficult for that person. The length of the grieving period may vary from person to person. No way is right or wrong to express the pain. The stages of grieving will not be predictable at all. Grief brings anger, stress, guilt despair and hatred. So, be careful. Keep an eye on that person’s behavior, but don’t tell him what to do and what not.
9. Be With That Person
That person may feel depressed and alone, always be with him. Being in a difficult situation like the death of a parent means a lot to anyone. That person needs constant mental support to deal with the truth. Support him and be with him. Avoid saying wrong things at the wrong timing as those things may hurt the person. Maintain the support right from the funeral to the end of the grieving process.
8. Offer Help To His Family
The whole family of that person needs support for sure, but they would ask for it because they might feel guilty of receiving so much attention already. So, try to help his family in each possible way. Do some favors by doing simple tasks for them. Offer help for shopping for groceries, housework, cleaning, laundry, and related activities. Let them know you are just a phone call away from any help. It will be beneficial for the person who is coping with a parent’s death.
7. Decision Making
It is difficult for a person to be mentally stable in such cases. If you want to help that person, help him with the decision making. Don’t let that person take any big and important decisions in that span. Due to mental turbulence, wrong commitments can be done. If there is an urgent need to make an important decision, you should efficiently support that person.
6. Focus On Mental Health
Taking care of that person’s health is another part, but you should focus on his mental health too. Ask that person to focus on the activities he loves. (Not immediately!) Remind that person of some drinking water, eating food on time, sleeping correctly for the proper functioning of the body and mind, both. Try keeping that person away from stressful situations like the sudden need of money to someone or other responsibilities.
5. Suggest Reading
Reading is the best activity for mental stability. Suggest some happy and positive books of the person who is suffering from grief. Reading calms the mind and gives a whole new perspective on life. It is sometimes more effective than person to person talking.
Self-help books are best to read during this phase, and there are plenty of them available in the market and online. Books will never fail to show some light of hope and faith in dark times like coping up with parent’s death.
4. Make Sure That The Person Gets Proper Sleep
Sleep is the best healing factor in any case. When a person suffers from grief, he needs to mental peace and a calm mind. It is only possible when that person gets the proper sleep. Sleeping does cooling and healing of the body.
It is always challenging to decide what to say to a person who is grieving. But instead of saying something, listen to that person. Acknowledge the loss but don’t put your views about anything and let that person speak. Listen calmly and show empathy so that the person will speak his heart out and the grieving process will end sooner which is better for that person. But make sure you don’t force that person to open up. Don’t ask any random questions. Just ask that person if he feels like speaking. Always be genuine in communication if happening any.
2. Avoid Saying Some Random Stuff
Many people, when going to the funeral, say things like ‘It’s a part of God’s plan,’ ‘Be happy in what you have,’ and ‘He/she is in the better place now.’ It will hurt that person to a greater extent. All these random words should be unspoken because you don’t know the intensity of pain and grief that a person is suffering.
1. Be In Touch
Even after the person’s grieving process is over, stay in contact with that person. Meet him after some interval. Send postcards or letters and ask how he is. Talk about some good things because the shock phase of that person is over by now. Ask about his current situation and what’s happening his life. Offer support if possible. All these things will mean a lot to that person.
All of us know that nobody is immortal, and we all are going to die but still, we can’t get over the death of loved ones. It is pretty obvious because of the connections and relations we establish with the close people are unbreakable. We think that a part of us died with the death of our loved ones and push ourselves in more grief.
Anyone will take time to cope up with the parent’s death because it is not easy. But as a supporter, you must take care of that person physically as well as mentally. Don’t leave that person alone when it comes to important decisions of life. Of course, you should give that person some self-time because the grieving process and rate are two different things for everyone.
Mental health is most important in this phase as that person may feel anxious, nervous, stressed and alone. All these feelings are not suitable for that person’s health because they may affect a person’s well being.