Making people love you is hard, almost impossible, but getting them to hate you is a piece of cake. People get annoyed at the tiniest of things, and if you annoy them one time too often, they will start hating you. Lying constantly, stealing things, gossiping, hogging the blanket, reminding the professor about homework and being a sore loser are some of the things that can make people hate you.
However, many a times, our unintentional behaviour makes people dislike us. Without even knowing it, we do things that make others hate us. It can be as simple as walking too slow on a sidewalk or chewing too loudly- we humans can be very short tempered and judgemental at times. But there are a few things that will make even your friends hate you. So here is a list of ten things you should avoid doing if you don’t want to lose friends and alienate people.
Something as simple and innocent as not opening your eyes fully can make people dislike you. According to one research, people who only open their eyes halfway are perceived to be less trustworthy and likeable. Squinting eyes signify a lack of interest and callousness in a person. So the next time you are making a sexy face at your date, narrowing your eyes, keep in mind that you may be driving him away, for he is subconsciously perceiving you as unlikeable. In contrast, people who open their eyes fully and don’t squint are considered more likeable and trustworthy.
9- Offer relationship advice
If you are that person in the group who is always dispensing advice to other friends on their relationships- Congratulations! You’re one step closer to having people hate you. The thing is, nobody really wants concrete advice when it comes to their relationships. Most people just like to vent, and to them you should offer a sympathetic ear and a shoulder. Not advice. Because when things go wrong between them, they can simply blame your well meaning advice and start hating you. Offering relationship advice to friends has sounded the death knell for many a friendships, so refrain from doing it.
8- Interrupt people
Here’s the thing about human beings- we don’t like sharing the limelight, and we like taking the centre stage every now and then. One of the easiest ways to get people to dislike you is to continually interrupt them while they are talking. If your friend is telling a funny story to a group of people and you know how it ends, shut your trap and let them finish it. If another friend is venting her problems and wants you to listen, shut up and do so. Nobody likes a person who is constantly offering their own opinion and interrupting people. It signifies that you are not interested in what they have to say.
7- Hate on people’s pets
You may or may not know this, but most people are very possessive about their pets. Some, like April from Parks and Recreation, even feel like they should be awarded for not being human beings. Cause most human beings suck. So if you hate on people’s pets, chances are those people will hate you. Most pet owners trust their pets’ instincts so much that they don’t like anyone their pet doesn’t like. If you are a guest at someone’s place and don’t like their cat, dog, frog or parrot, keep your opinion to yourself. Remember, their pets live there, you don’t.
6- Cancel plans too often
Pretty soon you’ll have a reputation for being the friend who is no good. Everybody understands that work comes up from time to time and people have to cancel, but do it once too often and people will start hating you. If you make plans and cancel them too often, your former friends will start thinking that you don’t value them at all, or that you are too high and mighty for them. Make time out for people who matter- your friends and family- because you don’t want to have them disliking you.
5- Be too nice
Believe it or not, people are actually distrustful of people who are too nice. Suspicion and scepticism is so deeply ingrained in us that now are mistrusting of anyone who is too nice and kind. For us, a little bit of deception is only natural in personal equations, so we are doubtful of a person who is too nice to others. We feel, subconsciously, that he has some ulterior motive. So if you don’t want people to hate you, you should act naturally around them. Don’t be too sweet, for they may take it the wrong way. Sigh. There’s just no pleasing people.
4- Borrow things and don’t return
People think of you as a thief. I know I do, you lowdown piece of scum. If you have borrowed something of mine, you better return it. People spend time, money and energy in choosing their possessions. For you to permanently borrow them is just wrong. If you have borrowed someone’s clothes, books or other items, return them as soon as you’re done with them. For clothes, have them cleaned before you return them. If you have borrowed sugar or salt from your neighbours, pay them back in kind. And as for money, the easiest way to make people hate you is to borrow money and not return it.
3- Always be late
Time is precious for everyone involved in your plans. If you don’t show up on time, you’re telling people that their time doesn’t matter. And most people, in fact, resent that implication. Being punctual implies that you are careful, conscientious and concerned about other people. Being fashionably late sometimes is one thing, but to keep people waiting for you for a long period is quite another. It’s worse if people are depending on you to take them somewhere. So try and avoid being late to gatherings.
2- Brag about yourself
It’s so easy to hate a person who keeps on bragging! While some people may feel bad about hating people for all the above-mentioned points, thinking that they do not necessarily make a person bad, most people will have no qualms about hating a show-off. A boaster puts other people down, and it’s natural to hate such people. Nobody is interested in how much your necklace cost you or how big your latest car is. If you keep bragging about your house, your kids, your pedigree poodle, your shiny car and your solitaires, pretty soon you will find yourself with no friends to brag to.
1- Don’t pay for yourself
This one is a deal clincher. About 99.99% of friend groups will admit to hating that one friend who never pays for themselves. It is basic etiquette that when you go out in a group, you pay for yourself. To expect others to do it for you is just about the easiest way to alienate yourself from the said group. Money is a sensitive topic amongst friends and family, so don’t make it awkward by asking others to pay your bill. Your excuses will just become fodder for a back-biting session on you. If you are short on cash, cut back on your social outings, it’s better than acting like a beggar.